I Declare Joffrey the One True Fetus-Rouser

I am ready to like being pregnant again. It is still a gross and uncomfortable process, but I’m on an upswing right now in the Bearable and Not-So-Gross-I-Want-to-Sell-My-Reproductive-Organs departments. The super disgusting thing that made me throw up my hands in defeat last week is gone, but not forgotten. Never forget. And the whole ordeal was overshadowed when I hit some exciting milestones yesterday.

Easter marked my official crossing of the 20 Weeks line. I am halfway done! I am trying to be optimistic about this, because it felt like forever to get to this point. Here’s hoping the next 20 weeks doesn’t crawl like a wounded snail. I’m not finding out I’m pregnant until I’m at least 18 weeks next time. Four weeks is way too early and gives me too much time to be aware that I am person-baking.

My second milestone yesterday occurred while Adam and I were watching Game of Thrones before bed. That is our new favorite show, by the way. It’s violent as hell, but the gratuitous sex scenes make up for all the intestine-spilling. Anyways, as we were watching the Season One finale, I felt something in my belly. Being pregnant for 20 weeks introduces you to all the different ways having gas can feel, so I wasn’t sure of exactly what I was feeling. Then, I felt the thing again, and told Adam to pause the show, because I was pretty sure that the thing was a kick!

Even our baby can't believe no one has SlapChopped this butthole's head off.

Adam put his hand on my belly and started talking to try to get the baby moving, but apparently the baby just responds better to Joffrey. It took a while to feel a third kick, but Adam couldn’t feel it. The fourth one was small for me, so I knew he wouldn’t feel that one, either.

Now, when I say “kick,” I really mean flutter. I’m not getting beat up from the inside just yet. The baby is still pretty small and kind of a wuss. But I’ve got 20 more weeks to feel its growing wrath as Season Two progresses. But I am enjoying the crap out of this right now. I stayed in bed forever this morning, pushing on and poking my belly, trying to get a reaction. Just me, hanging out with my baby, playing Kick the Mom. I have been really excited to get to this point, because it’s hard sometimes to not know what is going on in there. I have these moments now where my baby is saying “HEY! MA! MA! MA! MA! MA!” and it’s not annoying yet and the kid is not asking me to borrow the car (no) and these kicks let me feel like we are both doing alright. So, thanks for checking in, baby person.

On a non-baby note, I am trying to think of something I can post weekly that won’t be about babies and growing babies. If you’ve got suggestions, or any particular topic you are dying to hear my weekly opinion on, let me know. This is all in an effort to get me posting consistently with a schedule and more than just once a week.

And on another non-baby note, I am depleting the world’s supply of peanut butter and chocolate, one Reese’s Egg at a time. The egg and bunny version of Easter is one of my faves. Anyone else digging into some serious Easter treats this week? Or Passover treats? Does Passover have treats? If so, should I be eating those, too?

The one true king.

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